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Morphman .png
You thought Jim the Knight seemed pathetic? Well he's a badass compared to this guy...
Gender: Male
Type: Completely Weak and Brainless "Hero"
Species: Human
Portrayed by: Unknown
Status: Alive
Media of Origin: Morphman

Morphman is the protagonist of the 1993 video game with the same name. He is a superhero who must use shape-shifting technology in order to save the scientist, a creator of the lair of a rogue faction that wants to use his research for evil and got himself trapped along the way.

Why He Can't Morph

  1. He has an unappealing yet forgettable character design. His design looks like a Ronald McDonald knockoff from the orange afro, down to the red costume with a big yellow M on it.
  2. He's written very poorly.
    • To further show how badly written he is, he morphs into things with or without samples in a rather inconsistent way.
      • He morphs into an eagle even when he can automatically morph into a jet,
      • He somehow morphed into a robot dog he killed moments ago without getting a sample to kill a Minotaur with a laser even when Morphman's very own lasers were useless.
      • He was somehow able to fly outside the cockpit despite his body being a jet that just exploded. Which is just contradicting logic.
      • He was even able to morph into an ant after killing it, all without getting a sample.
  3. At the beginning of the game, he takes forever to get to his next line (which means that the viewer has to sit through 20 seconds of silence just for him to say "someplace"), which is time-wasting.
  4. He spouts out cringe-worthy dialogue, asks dumb questions, and at one point in the game, he even tells the viewer every single thing he does as if he is talking to a two-year-old.
  5. Morphman comes out very short by personality and character development. He's basically a typical comic-book/"action hero" type of protagonist and practically any other generic idiot hero from the '70s to the '90s in a nutshell. This makes him very clichéd. He's basically a typical "I'm gonna save the world" type of protagonist with nothing else to say about him aside from being a moron who morphs into things, hence the explanation.
  6. He is way too simple-minded, idiotic, pathetic, and lame to be a hero we should root for.
    • He is so inept, he puts Jim the Knight, Lester the Unlikely, and Zak from Cyberia (1994) to shame. Despite his superpowers, Morphman can be easily killed by anything in seconds, from generic situations to the point of being knocked out by a blunt object and taken away by an ant.
  7. Because of how weak and clumsy he is, he can come off as a generic Butt-Monkey.
  8. Many idiotic moves: If he has shown to be able to morph into anything by sample and has the ability to shoot lasers as his answer to fighting enemies, why does he just use any of them whenever he has to instead of doing pointless things in order to do so?
    • For example, when he fights a pair of living skeletons, instead of blasting them with his lasers, he takes a sample from them to become one in order to fight them. Which is just a stupidly nonsensical way to fight them.

Redeeming Qualities

  1. Despite saving the villain from his lair that exploded while Morphman was an eagle, it was nice of him to save the evil scientist.
  2. His dumb remarks can come off as laughable.
    • "I'm an eeeeeagle!"
  3. Despite how stupid his dialogue is, at least he doesn't have an ungodly annoying voice for anyone to listen to.


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