Seaman

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NOTE: This was originally on mainspace, but I moved it to a blog because it looked more like a joke page. MarioMario456 (talk) 16:36, 4 June 2021 (UTC)

"ALL HAIL SEGA!"

I, Seaman, am the protagonist of the 1999 video game of the same name.

Why I Suck

1. Whenever someone talks to me, I fling shit towards him/her.
2. I wanted to know every personal aspect about the player (i.e. Religion and politics).
3. I mate in front of the player's face, even when he/she doesn't want to see it.
   • I also freely announce it for no particular reason.
     • My mate dies after I'm finished mating.
4. I also contradict that I am actually a fictional character!
5. I insist that whenever the player sees me and listens to me, I exist as part of the player's consciousness!
6. ALL HAIL SEGA! Waste your money on another Dreamcast.
7. My design is also very ugly to look at as well.

My Redeeming Qualities

1. I was the reason Seaman became successful.
2. If you at least wanted a virtual pet, I could be yours if you owned a SEGA Dreamcast.
3. I was quite decently voiced by the late Leonard Nimoy, who also voiced Spock from the Star Trek Series.

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