Alan (Sleepaway Camp)

Alan is the main character of the 2008 awful and poorly-received horror film, mh:awfulmovies:Return to Sleepaway Camp. He is portrayed by an actor named Michael Gibney.

Why He Sucks

 * 1) He is completely unlikable, mean-spirited, and is downright childish.
 * 2) The shirt he wears throughout the movie is filthy, stained, and absolutely disgusting looking.
 * 3) He’s very hypocritical, he doesn’t want to be bullied but has shown to consistently bully other people.
 * 4) He doesn’t even obey the rules of the camp counselors and instead picks fights with them and insults them as well.
 * 5) He has the personality and behavior of a 5-year-old spoiled troublemaking brat.
 * 6) His catchphrase, “Your ass stinks!”, is idiotic and absolutely ridiculous.
 * 7) He’ll throw a fit like a toddler if something doesn’t go his way and/or when he’s being bullied by someone.
 * 8) The actor that plays him, Michael Gibney, gives a straight-up awful performance (probably the worst in the film).
 * 9) He is by far one of the most unlikable and beastly protagonists in movie history.
 * 10) In fact, he’s so unlikeable that it’s extremely difficult to root for and side with him in the film.
 * 11) In one scene, he threatens his bunkmates with a lighter and hairspray, and even tried to kill Mickey with a knife.
 * 12) His tone of voice can get very whiny, infantile, irritating, and can get on your nerves VERY quickly.

The Only Redeeming Quality

 * 1) He was revealed to not be the killer at the end of the movie.